I liked this, and hope you enjoy it.
Opening the Lodge
WM: OK Bruvvers, ere's the brief
WM: Tickle them ivories John.
WM: Bruvvers, 'elp us to open this 'ere gaff
WM: Bruvver..... why do we 'ave to look lively?
JW: To make sure the wood's in the 'ole, Guvnor.
WM: Well, don't just stand there
JW to IG: OK, Bruvver.... you 'eard the Guv
IG to JW: Done, John.
JW to WM: Done, Guv.
WM to SW: The next bit?
SW: To see that the Bruvvers are all in the firm.
WM: Come on, Bruvvers, shake a leg.
WM to JW: 'ow much top brass in this 'ere drum?
JW: Free Guv. You and the two oppo's wiv the cuffs.
WM to SW: Bruvver SW, 'ow many others?
SW: Free John, besides the bouncer, namely the bloke on the door and the two geezers wiv the pool cues.
WM to JW: Where's the bouncer then?
JW: Outside the gaff, all tooled up.
WM: Why's that then?
JW: E's packing a blade in case we're busted Guv.
WM to SW: The bloke on the door?
SW: 'overin abaht a bit
WM: Wot the 'ell for?
SW: To check the tickets, admit new punters and do wot e's told by my oppo.
WM to JW: Where's the JD?
JW: Over there.
WM: Why?
JW: To grass to you, Guv and chivvy 'em all up a bit.
WM to SW: And the other one?
SW: Next to you Guv.
WM: Why?
SW: Errand boy, Guvnor.
WM to JW: Bruvver JW, wot abaht you?
JW: On the sidelines. Guv
WM: Why?
JW: To nip dahn the pub wiv the bruvvers, get some booze and grub, and get em all back 'ere before the last bell.
WM to SW: Bruvver SW, wot abaht you?
SW: Down the shallow end Guv.
WM: Wot the 'ell for?
SW: To let 'em know when its ligh'ing up time and to close down the gaff when all the bruvvers 'ave 'ad their cut.
WM to IPM: Where am I?
IPM: At the sharp end, Guv
WM: Why's that then?
IPM: To keep them lot on their toes, open the gaff and get 'em at it.
WM: Bruvvers, now that we're all 'ere, its eyes down for a full 'ouse, but before we do, lets get the boss in the technical drawing department to tip us the wink so there's no aggro.
ALL: Nice one, Guvnor!